Paris Hilton Has Gas, Levi Johnston Buys New Hockey Stick, Local Beautician Teaches Her Kids To Hate The Black President . . .

KEEP US POSTED!
I'd like to congratulate the "liberal press" for making celebrities out of the white-trash assclowns who boycotted Obama's back-to-school speech. Juneau's own miserable excuse for a newspaper chose to feature one of them right smack on its front page.
Must our legitimate news sources join the supermarket tabloids in making media heroes out of the dumbest members of our society?

Embarrassing Day

Think about it--school kids needing permission from their parents to hear the president speak.
Politics? Bullshit! It's racism, pure and simple.
What an embarrassing day for the United States of America--and what a disappointing day for the rest of the world.

Of Course, With All Their Illegitimate Children, Ben and Tom May Have Been "Pro-Lifers"

To those members of the Religious Right who insist that this is a "Christian country": Try removing your noses from the Bible long enough to check out some history books.
Benjamin Franklin claimed that religion was "the worst thing to ever happen to the human race." Thomas Jefferson declared Christianity to be "the most ridiculous of all religions."
Do these sound like men founding a Christian country?

I Guess We Didn't See The Fine Print: "Unless There's A Black President"

You've got to love it! After campaigning endlessly for school prayer and "Creationism," on the eve of Obama's back-to-school speech the Religious Right has decided that "schools are no place for teaching values."
Apparently, reading the Bible in public schools (a clear insult to the Constitution) is okay, but a pep talk from the president is "socialist indoctrination."
Fascinating!

Welcome To The Coliseum, Here's Your Remote

Some things never change. Not when it comes to what entertains us. Watching a horrible movie last night, it struck me that one of the basic principles of entertainment hasn't changed since the Roman gladiator shows: There is a victim, and it ain't me. (The Romans sometimes brought a starving slave to their food orgies. Not being the guy starving to death enhanced the enjoyment of overeating.)
This is why crime, car crashes, and cage fighting are such popular entertainments. That's not me being murdered. That's not me being caught and sent to prison. That's not me in the burning race car. That's not me with some muscle-bound, extra-male-chromosome mutant beating my head in.
(Interestingly, this principle also applies to comedy. A hundred people walk around the banana peel--Charlie Chaplin steps on it and falls on his ass. We would be the smart ones that walk around it. We wouldn't be the injured fool lying on the sidewalk.)

Hey Limbaugh, Can You Spare A Few Oxy's? I'll Go Easy On You For A While--Anything To Stop This PAIN!

I am in a foul mood. My back has been injured, keeping me in near constant PAIN, but the health insurance provided by my current carpentry gig doesn't kick in for another 2 weeks. So, I will be able to see a doctor--eventually. But for right now, PAIN.

This brings up an interesting feature of our medical system.
While I was unemployed all summer with zero money coming in and my meager savings dwindling, I was expected to pay out-of-pocket for my medical care. Now that I'm employed, with money coming in, my medical care will be paid for. This is the usual situation in our Alice-In-Wonderland health-care system--the only people getting free medical care are the people who can afford medical care. The poor and unemployed are screwed. Nice!

I'm facing a rough 2 weeks, but I ease the PAIN by imagining that I'm projecting it on to the fat-cat Republicans and ignorant yay-hoos who are fighting Obama's universal health-care plan.
Are Americans really that selfish? Do we really believe that only the prosperous are entitled to be free of PAIN? Shit! Here come the spasms--take that O'Reilly, here's one for you Palin, you like that Hannity, how does that feel Dodson . . .

Have Another Helping Of Bacon--Your Cardiologist Is Putting In A New Pool

An attorney's financial reward is determined by the number of cases he wins; an athlete's by the number of games he wins; a musician's by how well he plays; an artist's by how well he has mastered his craft.
In America, a doctor is rewarded by the length and severity of your malady.

Do you think that this has anything to do with Americans paying several times more for health care than citizens of other wealthy nations and getting poorer results?