"But the Men Who Took Away Your House and Job Were Such Good Christians."

It's election season again and I'm sick of hearing about personal values. When did Americans decide that anyone who goes to church every Sunday and doesn't cheat on his spouse would be a good leader?
I really don't believe that Hitler's clean living habits (he was a non-smoking, non-drinking vegetarian) enhanced his stature as a head of state. Likewise, being a drunken lecher has not kept Ted Kennedy from being a dedicated servant to his constituents. It just doesn't work that way.
If they do their jobs well, I don't care if our next administration is made up of crackheads who have sex with chickens. Look at what a bunch of clean living born-agains have done to this country over the past 8 years.

And the Boston First-Baseman Who Made that Error in the World Series, and Barry Manilow, and Tanya Harding, and . . .

The presidential race is heating up and so are the smear campaigns. Predictably, the right-wing racist fringe is attacking Obama viciously. It has pointed out that since Barack's one black parent has Islamic ancestry, clearly candidate Obama is responsible for Osama bin Laden. Good thinking.
Obama is half white. Therefore, I guess he is also responsible for Hitler, Jack the Ripper, and Paris Hilton.

" . . . we'll have a barrel of fun!" Now Isn't That Better?

Yes, I watched some of the Olympics. The water polo and badminton kept me on the edge of my seat. But what I really enjoy is the music. I think that national anthems should be judged like the other events. I'd give:
USA: 9.5 for degree of difficulty.
France: 9.6 for artistic merit.
Germany: a perfect 10 for scariness.
Hey Germany, with folks still walking around who will either automatically click their heels or dive under a bed at the sound of "Deutschland uber alles," couldn't you lighten up a bit? How about a polka? Everyone associates Germany with polkas, and who doesn't love a good polka? It might be good PR, and spare some nerves.

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Keep Him Away From The Beach, Too

Big flap currently in Seattle. Mothers are protesting the new wave of drive-thru espresso stands with bikini-clad baristas. They're worried about their impressionable young sons who might be along in the car.
Right. You wouldn't want little Tommy to see a woman in a bathing suit.
What's your kid doing in the car, anyway? He should be home in front of the TV, watching American Gladiator or Ultimate Cage Fighting, so that he will grow up to be a normal, well-adjusted American male.

Guilty or Guilty? . . . GUILTY!

After 7 years of being held without charges, Salim Hamdan has been tried at Guantanamo Bay and convicted--with the condition that if he was acquitted he could still be imprisoned indefinitely.
This is reminiscent of our 17th Century witch trials: A woman would be bound and thrown into a pond. If she drowned, she was innocent. If she floated to the surface, she was guilty of being a witch and was executed.

"And Have These On You At All Times!"

I can't believe that the controversy over sex and drug education is in the news again.
It seems very simple to me. There should be one combined sex and drug education class in our schools, and it should last about one minute.
The teacher holds up a condom in one hand and a joint in the other: "When you want to have sex with someone, use this. When you feel like shooting someone, smoke this. Class dismissed."